She's a character, she has opinions.

Back to reality.

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Did you ever go on a vacation and when you got home at the end of it think “back to reality”? Yeah, me too. At least I used to. Now I just envy those of you who can truly get away from it all.

I would give almost anything to get away from my reality. Sure, I can take a vacation, but that isn’t going to help since the reality I need to get away from is my own body. No matter what I do or where I go, I’ll still have CFIDS. I can’t leave it at home like you do most of your stressors when you go on vacation, it’s going to follow me wherever I go.

Sometimes I get the impression that people think it must be wonderful to stay at home as often as I do, to recline in bed on a stack of pillows and just do nothing. I think it must be, too, if that’s really all you’re doing. But I’m lying here on my pillows with my whole body aching and feeling so tired I could cry. I’m desperate to find a way to finish my homework and I already know I’ve no energy to make dinner. To be honest with you, I should just call an end to the entire day and go to bed.

Boy, I said to myself earlier today when I realized how stressed I was, I could use a vacation. I could. But until they come up with Total Recall style virtual vacations I’m just going to have to take my reality on vacation along with me.

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Written by tldegray

September 30, 2010 at 4:00 pm

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